My Quest for Change
My Quest for Change started in May 2017 when my life got impacted by a meteor pounding in to my soul at warpspeed.
In May 2017 I lost my soulmate, my wife. What happened is not the topic of this article, but how I later analyzed the entire situation and how I got in that situation is. It made me reconsider priorities and it also gave me the insight to change.
First of all I discovered that during my marriage I forgot who I was. I forgot what I liked, what I loved, what gave me energy.
When my wife left me, I was a drift, without purpose, without drive.
In the months following I was alone, struggling with the solitude, struggling with the freedom I had gained, clinging to what was lost.
Strange enough, I figured out that what drives me is Freedom.
Freedom to do what I want, freedom to choose my path, freedom to fail.
A man can be himself only so long as he is alone, and if he does not love solitude, he will not love freedom, for it is only when he is alone that he is truly free.
However getting to realize this was not easy. Advised by Kaz and Levi, 2 Fitness Atletes, I needed to achieve some structure in my day to day life. And since I strive on Chaos, I had no idea on how to achieve this.
Entropy is the Price of Structure
Fitness and the help of Kaz & Levi provided me this safe-haven. I began to organise my life around it.
Surrounded me with people whom had experience and knowledge about it. I went to the gym on a daily basis. I pushed my body to its limits, I adjusted my food drastically where fastfood and other non-healthy variants were totally banned of the menu.
And I started to create goals again. I promised myself to lose fat and get a shredded body. Everything functioned and was orchestrated around this one goal: 8% bodyfat and 86kg.
Slowly but steadily my entire view on myself and life slowly started to change. I slowly got grip about my feelings. I slowly started to belief in myself again. I slowly started to let go of the past, of the one I truly and deeply loved, and still love.
My goal was to strive for freedom, being indepedent. To achieve this I needed positive people around me who push me and motivate me in what I do and take me to that next level.
So step 1 was dumping all negative people around me. I dropped all those winers and negative people. I let go the idea of my wife still loving me, because she clearly did not anymore. Clinging to her was wrong and made me put my life on hold.
Only the ones with vision in life, vision in business, open-minded remained.
When there is no vision, people perish
Step 2 was putting my own goals. Like in Fitness where I clearly stated my goal, I decided to do exactly the same in Life. My Goal is to use Time as efficiently as possible.
This means my Time is the most precious asset I have and I only wish to monetize it doing stuff I love with people I care about and love.
My goal in life is to build a life where I do not need a vacation from
Step 3 was building my masterplan. How can I achieve my goals. This is still a work in progress and still a lot of actions need to be taken and pieces of the puzzle need to fall in place but it will happen.
But more on that shortly.
Special thanks to my mom, my brothers, Ralph, Dave and for sure also that big guy from Amsterdam who I admire, Kaz, and my fitness mentor, Levi.